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We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.
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The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn\'t get bigger or heavier.
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To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
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Emulate your heros, but don\'t carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
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Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
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To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.
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I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.
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If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.
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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
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A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
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I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
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No one can earn a million dollars honestly.
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Anyone who starts a sentence, \'With all due respect ...\' is about to insult you.
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The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.
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An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
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Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
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Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
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You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it.
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I\'ve never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I\'ve seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.
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Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can\'t remember what they are.
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Real life is that big, high-res, high-color screen saver behind all the windows.
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Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.
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If women didn\'t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
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I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/17/(Tue) 03:58
